I asked my friends and fluid pour painting group members to help me decide if I should post this painting or not on my daily painting challenge. I wasn't sure if it was just a jumbled mess that would be embarrassing to post or if people saw something in it. I received an overwhelming amount of thought-provoking responses that helped me look deeper into the soul of the painting and into my artistic soul.
After creating the piece, I had thought about naming the painting Cancer. The colors and energy felt like fear and anger smothering out peace and happiness as cells were overcome with disease... I looked up the meaning of the colors in the painting and found yellow can represent peace and happiness but also represents disease. Red initiates feelings of anger, energy, power and the lost past... It seemed fitting yet too controversial and naming it Cancer encouraged too much negative reaction for hurting memories which is not how I want to contribute to life. I want to offer happiness, joy and whimsy and not focus on the negative that can devour our souls if we let it. But cancer is an evil fact and we simply cannot escape the ugliness, anger, fear and helplessness that cancer causes.
It's the first piece I've done to create so much conflict on why this dark painting unintentionally came out of my usually cheerful, bright art soul. I see myself as a very, very simple artist, mimicking the beauty and whimsical side of nature in my paintings and I ponder how this painting came to be from my own hand. Possibly from watching too much Criminal Minds or SciFi shows? Or did the energy of frustration from my nerve pain expose itself onto the canvas? Or maybe, quite simply and TRULY, I only attempted to save a painting with the mixed paint I had on hand...
Regardless of unintentional or subconscious reasoning, this piece gave me another nibble at the possibilities of freeing my imagination from the chains of perfectionism and judgement that I so tightly wrap around my life and within my art.
I have decided to name it Conflict.
"Conflict"
14x14 Acrylic on Stretched Canvas